Mad World
Hating The Flyers
By Mark Madden

There's a fine line between low class and no class.

For example, the Philadelphia Flyers named Sidney Crosby the game's No. 3 star after the Penguins bowed to the Flyers, 8-2, at the Wachovia Center Dec. 11. Crosby had two assists, true, but the process ignored the Flyers' R.J. Umberger (Plum's own) who had three goals and two assists. The Flyers obviously "honored" Crosby to give the Philly faithful one last chance to jeer Crosby, as they had been doing in vulgar fashion all night. Low class, or no class? YOU make the call.

Flyers thug Ben Eager -- who has so little talent that selling him hockey equipment should be a misdemeanor - actually HECKLED Penguins Coach Michel Therrien after Therrien's post-game press conference Dec. 11, calling Therrien "a joke." This being the same Ben Eager who hit Georges Laraque with a blind-side cheap shot, assumed the fetal position when Laraque tried to retaliate, got the snot knocked out of him by 41-year-old Gary Roberts, then did not play a shift the rest of the night. Whether this indicated fear of Laraque on Eager's part or fear of Laraque by Coach John Stevens on behalf of Eager remains undetermined. Both, probably.

Low class, or no class? YOU make the call.

OK, you talked me into it. I'LL make the call. No class, to quote Motorhead. The Flyers are the most loathsome organization in sports history, and I just wish my buddy R.J. would fly that excrement-stained coop so I can begin rooting for the Flyers bus crash again.

The Flyers used organized gangland violence to cheat their way to two Stanley Cups in 1974 and 1975, and in doing so created a mentality that lasts to this very day. It's a thin façade of righteous aggression pasted on a foundation of barbaric stupidity. It runs rampant in their owner's box, in their locker room, in their stands, even in their press box, where the Philadelphia media routinely rubber-stamps hooliganism passing itself off as hockey as a legitimate way of playing the game. When they're not busy trying to brand Crosby a whiner and crybaby, that is.

You can never be too big, or too tough. Or too dumb, or too out of control.

Like most bullies, the Flyers are chickens at heart. Goalie Martin Biron came up challenging Crosby to fight when Sid fell and accidentally took Biron's skates out from under him. Minutes later, Laraque duplicated what Crosby did. Biron was too frightened to even make eye contact.

Eager, of course, didn't go back on the ice after blindsiding Laraque. As of Dec. 17, five Flyers had been suspended this season for hits from behind. The operative words, of course, are "from behind."

Flyers cowardice goes way back. Don Saleski was a Flyer goon during the Stanley Cup years. He specialized in sucker-punching, stick-swinging and being the third man in. Saleski got traded to Colorado in 1979, where Dave Schultz, Bob Kelly and the rest of the SS didn't have his back. The entire league delighted in getting revenge on the now-reticent "Big Bird," beating him out of the NHL in just over a year. Now that the odds were even, Saleski quit rather than fight.

Jan. 24 is when the Penguins next play the Flyers. Accounts will not be settled between Eager and Mr. Laraque, however, because Eager had the foresight to be traded to Chicago. The Penguins don't play the Blackhawks this season, thus enabling Eager to not only run, but also hide. Don't worry. Laraque will find him. Sooner or later, Laraque will find him.

I hate fighting in hockey. I hate the "might makes right" mentality. But the Flyers' tradition of idiocy makes even pacifists bloodthirsty. That may be their biggest crime of all.

Mark Madden hosts a sports talk show 3-7 p.m. weekdays on ESPN Radio 1250.